I need a vacation from my own thoughts.

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Vacation. You’ve been looking forward to this moment all year. Time to relax and rejuvenate. Well, that is for some people. Anyone else like me out there who tends to worry about every little thing in life? You just can’t seem to relax EVER, let alone while you’re on vacation. You know, the time when you really are supposed to be taking time out to relax. Or how about when you do finally relax, it’s time to go home! Yeah, turns out I need a vacay from my own thoughts.

This was my experience last week on my family vacation. I was looking forward to it for so long and honestly, all I did was worry about the stupidest shit. It’s nobody’s fault but my own. Don’t get me wrong, I did enjoy myself and my time with Steve and my family, but I definitely found myself worrying and being on edge for NO REASON! I wasn’t able to just be. It was like I couldn’t or wouldn’t allow myself to relax. The main reason being was that the house we rented last minute, the owners were staying upstairs. I was constantly worrying if we were too loud, was the porch a mess, were we opening and closing the door too much, blah, blah, blah. See, constant worrying over stupid shit.

Let’s not forget that there was 1 bathroom for 11 people. Yes people, we were shitting in shifts! Needless to say, I worried if someone was in the bathroom when someone else (or myself) had to use it. I’ll admit it, I was definitely a buzz kill/the fun police on this vacation. My poor family and Steve. God bless them for having to deal with my ridiculousness. I’m pretty sure that if my family and I were on “Survivor”, they would have voted me off the island after the first day.

It finally occurred to me to leave it be, give myself a break, and just enjoy being at my favorite place on earth…Long Beach Island.  The problem with that was when I finally came to my senses, it was the day before vacation was over. Typical, right? Why do we do this to ourselves? Why do we worry about things that really don’t matter? All it does is just take away from living in the moment and enjoying those around us. I personally have to put an end to the endless “what ifs” and worries. It’s so not worth it. Worrying is a complete waste of time. It doesn’t change anything, it just messes with your mind and steals your happiness.”I’ve got 99 problems and 86 of them are completely made up scenarios in my head that I’m stressing about for absolutely no logical reason. ” Yeah…Ain’t nobody got time for that!

As always, thank you taking the time to read. Be kind to yourself and make sure you take a vacay from your thoughts this week. And if you’re about to go on vacation, enjoy yourself, ok?

-Ange

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